Should we settle..?

So we're thirty something. Some SISTAH's feeling the clock ticking. There's a really nice guy, good values, with a good job who seems to adore every aspect of you. He brings the flowers on valentine's, is always home waiting for your phone call and willing to take you shopping, lime with your firends and go to the "girlie" movies. Just one problem .... He doesn't ring your bells!!! A roll in the sack is amazing once you fantasize about Denzel or Wesley! What do we do SISTAHs?? Well I could tell you in my twenties this was a no brainer - kick the guy to the curb! Somehow these days, without my even noticing it, my standards seem to be creeping downward. Maybe we could try tantric sex.... its all in the mind :). Why is it that as we get older our standards seem to get lower. For me, though I flirt with the idea of settling I know that I wont. Its just not in my make up. I know that there is a wonderful man out there who will have my bells chiming all the way to the church - (just haven't met any lately) but Im holding out for one. Am I being immature, naive? What do you think SISTAHs?

Welcome xxlyn

My dear xxlyn, wonderful that you have joined as a contributor because I do hope that we can help to change your opinion here (Readers can check out xxlyn's comments to the post below). I challenge you to a debate on this issue - Many men are 'crapholes' yes but we women allow them to continue to be because we put up with it when they're our man and we encourage it when they aren't!! Come on women are worth more than this - more than being an outside roll in the hay (the horner) or a neglected wife (the horned). Its not just about leaving the man, if there will always be women out there making it easy for men to be useless, sons of b's - My thing is not about excusing men its about calling Sistahs to a higher standard for themselves!

Married man drama ...

You know what? Im just tired tired of the boys parading out there pretending to be grown men. Ive created this blog so that we sistahs can vent, learn, love and in the end exhale. Im not about drama.. but sometimes drama is necessary. We cant sit back and allow ourselves to be treated like doormats. Why do we do it sistahs? Why? Are men soo necessary to our existence that we're prepared to share. When the married man starts to sweet talk us - what do we think? Do you feel special and sweet? Cant we see that its our sistah on the other end of the man's behind who is hurting. When we sistahs start to stick together, to think of each other first then no man will be able to hurt any one of us. Isnt that a great concept. Lets think of the sistahs! When I started writing this post I just let my fingers type - didnt know what I was about to say- I just knew that I wanted to connect with other sistahs out there who find that love doesn't really come that easy and even when it comes its no bed of roses. Am I the only one out there who thinks so? But can't we start a movement of enlightenment among ourselves where we join together and love each other and help each other have meaningful relationships. If each of us takes responsibility for our actions then thats one less woman out there to create drama for another sistah. Maybe we could find someway to identify with one another. Some way to start identifying true "sistahs". We need to recruit new "sistahs" every day. Hey hit me with a comment if you feel you have some ideas as to how to start this revolution.